Robust McManlyPants on Average Display

Note: I’m not sure I’d view either of these images while trying to eat.

This hilarious waste of perfectly good paint got linked from a comment thread on Unfogged sometime in the last few days. It’s well worth spending some time zooming around with one’s mouse and reading the explanatory text. Money quote: “Some stars shine brighter than others,” said of the stars on the American flag. My other favorite thing is probably the note that the little white boy represents both boys and girls and children of all races. Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

At any rate, tengu was chatting with me the other night and asked if I had seen the response piece, “One Nation Under Cthulhu” and sent me the link when I said I had not. I’m impressed! It’s got buckets of blood, Great Old Ones, Deep Ones, some critters that could arguably be Mi-Go and/or Star-Spawn of Cthulhu and Satan wearing an expression somewhere between perplexed and pleasantly surprised. No Shoggoths, but I guess they would tend to crowd others out. The arm-stump Elder Sign being drawn on the Constitution is the crowning touch of class.

Best comment from the Wonkette thread on the response piece had to be, “If he passes out loaves and fishes, tell him you already ate.”

Finally, because the Internet is nothing if not a space that encourages creativity, this animated GIF. If you don’t get it, watch They Live sometime. It’s a classic.

Bruce McCulloch, Kids in the Hall, 1990.

Stay classy, John C. Wright.

Seen this morning at Republic of Dogs, Fort Worth police raided a gay bar on the 40th anniversary of the Stonewall Inn riots, roughed up the patrons, put one in intensive care and started arresting people for “public intoxication.”

I can’t even process that this would happen now, in 2009. I want to say it’s a sign of our success, that it’s a backlash against the way we’ve managed to modify society to be somewhat more accommodating of us, but that’s not true. It’s just business as usual for the class of persons who think they have a right – usually god-given in their minds – to patrol the borders of acceptable behavior and fuck up anyone they feel like.

I hope a lot of people lose their jobs over this but somehow I suspect the result will be promotions.

A colleague sent me a link to a fascinating discussion of Iranian internet traffic patterns surrounding the election and what they say about what methods of access to and distribution of media the Iranian regime cut off to control information.

They’re using something called, amongst other things, “traffic shaping.” Basically it allows different types of traffic – web browsing vs. SSH vs. file-sharing vs. WoW vs. whatever – to be throttled or shut down without affecting other applications. As they note, WoW traffic went undisturbed but access to Flash video was all but eradicated. (I choose to forgive their mangling of WoW cosmology – Azeroth is a continent and the planet on which it is found, not an island – in light of their clever off-hand suggestion that WoW be a meeting place to organize protests in the real world.)

Looking at the final graph, here’s what they most blocked in descending order:

• SSH, normally used for encrypted command-line access but also very useful as a sneaky way to proxy web traffic. If you have a co-worker who can always get to anything online no matter what your IT staff does, and SSH is allowed, that co-worker is using an SSH proxy. (For purposes of full disclosure, guess who’s shite at getting that to work? Moi. I’ve just never cared that much.) Other possible transgressive uses of SSH: terminal session to an external host that has a command-line IRC client installed; encrypted file transfer; etc. If the chart listing percentage dropped is also a rough guide to their list of concerns then they are quite right to consider SSH the most subtle threat to their attempted smothering of information access.
• Flash, used by basically every video site, including YouTube and many news sites, to embed video.
• Bittorrent, which of course would make an excellent way to distribute, say, video of the militia murdering someone in the street without it being localized or necessarily traceable to the original person who held the camera.
• POP, because you don’t want just anyone receiving email from their international friends and relatives, do you?
• Alternative web ports and HTTP proxies are always a popular target for IT staff who want to control access to porn or, you know, news. I’m going to guess they’re just taking a stab at random ports that are likely candidates for alternate web traffic (say, TCP 8080 or 8181) but maybe they’re packing the serious web filtering heat on that scale. If so then I have to wonder if there are some embargoes being broken.
• Web cam = citizen journalist/potential YouTube star/access to international friends and family who’ve pointed a web cam at their HDTV tuned to CNN. Verboten!
• SMB: surprise, Microsoft is super-chatty in Farsi, too. Also file-sharing, though gods help the poor bastard who’s down to trying to share drives across international lines. Any modern ISP that is at all conscious of what it’s doing will be blocking this at its own borders anyway.
• Then, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay down the list: normal old web traffic, email (I’m assuming they mean SMTP and IMAP only, since they list POP separately) and FTP.

So, related to my web filtering comment above, I don’t know a damned thing about what embargoes are in place. Ever since I got yelled at by a corporate VP in 1994 for calling up the Commerce Dept. on my own initiative to ask them about regulations related to international shipping of books that discuss encryption I’ve kind of let the lawyers worry about that stuff. That said, the ability to do this kind of traffic shaping on this scale suggests access to equipment that I would expect is embargoed. I don’t know, though. Maybe they can just buy all their Networking Company X equipment directly from X’s contracted manufacturer in China, y’know? I sure don’t. (Know, that is.) Maybe they’ve got enough people sitting around that they can just write up manual access-lists and try to filter everything by port on whatever devices they’ve got that can take ACLs and that’s why they’re only blocking some of this. I don’t know. In some ways the article raises more questions than it answers, for me, since it makes me want to know the specific techniques and technologies being applied.

All that aside, doesn’t it just kind of stab the ghost of my freshman self through the heart with an icicle to see the internet used to limit information and mask access to the truth? Yes it does. Why it still surprises me I’ll never know.

58-57 on the second vote. That’s a close shave, but it’s good enough. For the first time ever NC state law makes specific, explicit mention of sexual and gender minorities as categories of persons who deserve equal treatment and protection. Today it feels pretty good to be a Tar Heel.

Tonight (Monday) the good version of the anti-bullying bill made it through the first of two votes in the NC House. This is the version that includes explicit mention of sexual orientation and gender identity as aspects of a student’s life that may make them more likely to be bulled.

The vote was a very close one – just 59 to 57 – but I am reminded of the time I had to back a truck over a flexible irrigation pipe at the research farm. The irrigation system was made up of flexible hoses joined to one another by metal couplings. Having been warned to avoid backing over a coupling I managed to miss the nearest one but only by about this much. When a co-worker teased me about it my boss said to me, “You know what? An inch is as good as a mile.”

Part of why I’ve followed this bill as closely as I have – I wrote to and called my state representative, who in fact voted in favor of the bill, and I’ve already sent a thank you message – is that I am so utterly galled by the two main conservative responses to this bill: to claim that recognizing that queer students are often picked on will somehow lead to gay marriage being legalized and to claim that the bill is insulting to teachers and administrators because it suggests they don’t know which kids need to be protected.

I hate to break it to the conservatives – Republican and Democrat alike – in the state house, but some teachers and principals plain don’t know which kids need to be protected. Worse, though, and much more likely in my experience, they know exactly which kids are the targets of bullying and for one or more of a variety of reasons they simply turn a blind eye. Worst of all, there are some teachers and administrators who actually join in.

This happened to me twice in high school. For various complicated reasons two of my high school teachers had explicit knowledge, or close enough so as not to make a difference, that I was a gay student in their school.

One had become one of my favorite teachers ever over the course of my senior year. She was warm and supportive in her commentary on my work and I did well in her class. When she found out I was gay, however, she immediately went cold. She just froze up like a block of ice. For the rest of the semester she didn’t address me directly that I can recall in any manner other than the bare minimum required by my presence in her classroom – say, during role call – or to criticize me in front of others. On the last day of school I stopped by her room to thank her for what I had learned that year – she remained a gifted teacher – and she simply looked at me before turning around and going back to what she was doing.

The other made fun of me to my face in front of most of our very large classroom. He was known, however, as a master manipulator and so of course he did it in an oblique way that would have required me to out myself to my classmates in order to call him on it. I have probably felt more humiliated in my life but I couldn’t say when. This left such an impression on me that a couple of years ago, when I heard he’d had some major health problems and that some old classmates were sending him cards together, I commented to The Boyf that I wanted to send the guy a card but that I wanted to write in it, “I guess I’m not disappointed that you lived.”

Hell, one of my acquaintances, when he asked an assistant principal to help him ward off some bullying, was told that “things might improve if [he] got a fucking haircut.” Yet another acquaintance was the object of such scorn that when he was assaulted one day in the lunchroom a group of teachers held up makeshift Olympics-style scorecards. Eventually he dropped out of school and, last I heard, had run off to a major city in another state and become a prostitute to support himself. He was in ninth grade.

I don’t think that the existence of these rules would have necessarily prevented the experiences I and others had. I know they wouldn’t have fixed the environment that made such treatment possible. However, having them on the books is important. Bureaucrats live and die by the letter of the law and a smart kid could potentially use these rules to chip away at the ground under the feet of an uncooperative or complicit administrator. A good teacher or a good administrator could use it as a shield against those in their communities who think fags are for beating up. It wouldn’t have stopped that teacher from making fun of me but it would have given me something to call him out on. When I was that age and convinced I was the only person in the world who felt what I felt, I would have taken all the help I could get.

In an ideal world, the conservatives who think this bill goes too far by naming categories of student, who think that teachers and administrators will protect all students equally, would be right. Unfortunately, we live in nothing even a little bit like an ideal world.

So, Vermont. Wow. Honestly, I’m surprised a state legislature made it happen this quickly. I had figured it would be several years. It was a squeaker, and it’s in the state that’s had some form of legal recognition for by far the longest, but wow. I am so very pleasantly surprised.

On the other hand, there’s this, currently running in Iowa:

Yeah. With our evil gay weather-control machines we have blocked a Massachusetts’ mother’s right to tell her kid she believes differently. Where the hell were these gay-friendly schools when I was a kid? Jeez!

The one that really chaps me, though, is the doctor. Here’s the thing: if you don’t want to work with the public, don’t put yourself in a position where you invite the public to come to your work and ask for your services. The same thing pisses me off about anti-birth-control pharmacists. If you don’t want to fill prescriptions, don’t go to fucking pharmacy school. How hard is that? What next, a Mormon bartender who’s really annoyed at all the alcohol he has to serve?

In my current position I have to do a lot of things I don’t like. I have to block people’s access to queer-related websites, as a matter of fact, when the client asks for it. Does it make me feel great? No. But you know what? It’s not my firewall, my network, my user or my business. I find workplace internet censorship filtering an offensive and condescending concept in general, to be honest, but it’s what pays the bills. I used to have a real problem with the idea of file-sharing on which I’ve since mellowed a great deal, even though I don’t participate in it myself (I do cling to the belief that if I like a work of art and entertainment that I should reward the artist/entertainer) but in my new job I’m probably going to be busting people for it. Oh well! If I weren’t willing to do the job asked of me, why show up? That’s part of why I left Ma Bell when I did and part of why I’m leaving This Company now. Showing up for work is, itself, a compromise for most of us; if it weren’t, they wouldn’t have to pay us to be there.

Well, whatever. It’s a losing battle they’re fighting and they know it. They are watching society welcome and assimilate yet another class of persons they found useful as targets for their bullying. I have to wonder where they’ll go next. What minority can they find to blame for everything? My guess is the immigrant community. Lou Dobbs is already over there swinging his bat and the moneycons won’t balk as long as the immigrants they target are poor and can’t read the sale papers. It must be hard, though, to be a conservative these days. It must be hard to have so much poison and hate pent up inside and to have fewer and fewer targets on whom to vent it. It must be hard to get up in the morning thinking storm clouds have to gather for the sun to shine on anyone else.

I confess that I am pleasantly surprised by the results. I’m even more surprised by the comments section being fairly interesting. For the internet, and especially for an internet discussion of gay marriage, it’s remarkably light on trolls.

Of course, I find their presentation of the follow-up question and its results a little odd. The poll shows 49% supporting some form of legal recognition of same-sex couples, but the article’s phrasing suggests that it was overwhelmingly opposed.

Equality NC has been getting the word out online about the new anti-equality amendment being touted by the right-wing minority in NC’s legislature. Things I didn’t know until Equality NC pointed them out include:

• NC is the only Southern state without an anti-gay amendment
• Fundie state legislators are trying to gin up a fake “grassroots” movement by coercing local governments into passing statements calling for an amendment and encouraging fundamentalist ministers to speak favorably – from the pulpit – of the anti-gay amendment

Equality NC’s Kay Flamino makes an excellent point in her post about this: passing an anti-gay amendment would cost the state $3,000,000. What else could they do with that money?

The thing that freaks me out about this is that I’ve always, to be absolutely honest, kind of blithely assumed this sort of amendment would never happen in NC. Such things have been killed in the state legislature so many times that I just figured it would never stand a chance of happening here. NC is the only place I’ve ever lived and, in all honesty, the only place I’ve ever wanted to live. I really do not want to find out that my state doesn’t return that affection. I really do not want to find out that prejudice outweighs all the things The Boyf and I contribute to our community. I really do not want to find out that when I pay my taxes that I am picking up the tab for my own persecution.

After seeing Milk I said that I needed to get involved in activism again. Is this my issue? If so, what do I do?

I’m going to make a prediction, hangover be damned: NC will be certified blue in a matter of days. The 40,000 to 50,000 provisional ballots outstanding simply will not be so overwhelmingly in favor of McCain that they erase Obama’s 11,000 vote lead. Having worked a few elections now, I can tell you who winds up voting a provisional: college students and new voters. Neither of those are likely McCain voters.

Why college students, one might ask? That’s easy: they don’t know they aren’t registered or they don’t have the ability to vote in their “normal” precinct so on election day, between classes, they walk into the nearest polling place and wind up voting a provisional. It is entirely likely that hundreds of Durham County’s provisional ballots from yesterday fall into this category as students walked in who (a) thought they had registered but hadn’t or whose registrations had failed to make it into the books or (b) lived off-campus and had someplace else in town as their “real” polling place walked into the one next to campus thinking they could just vote wherever.

Why new voters? Because they don’t know where to go and so they go to the polling place they see on their way to/from work or the one that’s nearby when they get a break.

There are exceptions and there are theories that some measure of provisionals are from recently-moved retirees and from retirement homes but they don’t hold water. Recently relocated retirees are always on top of their voting registration and retirement home residents don’t show up in person and wind up voting a provisional. Anyone who votes a provisional walks in the door and has the stamina to fill out a bunch of paperwork. Both of these favor Obama. That’s a pretty harsh thing to say, but it’s true.

Now I’m scared to post this for fear of jinxing my state turning blue.

This weekend I drove from Durham to Asheville and back. Along the way, counting only cars with NC tags and not counting my own, Obama cars were winning 8 (four sedans, two mini-vans and two pickups) to 4 (two sedans and two mini-vans). Counting cars with in-state and out-of-state tags, Obama was winning 8 to 6 (two ginormous RVs towing SUVs behind them, both with Texas plates).

So, apparently the Tardis made an appearance in Durham this morning as there were fundamentalist protesters at the film festival, fresh out of 1996. (KJ recollected that was the last NC Pride at which she recalled seeing an organized protest.) Mostly they were of the quiet and dour disposition but one was really bothersomely loud, shouting a sermon from out on the sidewalk by the street. Early in the afternoon a counter-protest arrived and consisted mainly of a woman in an extremely elaborate outfit consisting of pink feathery things and a headdress. I described her to KJ as “double drag,” as she was a woman dressed like a man dressed like a woman. She was loud(er) and enthusiastic and could sing and was very engaging and drew immediate applause and crowd interaction.

Whoever you are, lady in the pink feathers, you rule.

There were several things that occurred to me during the course of the spectacle of that dim shadow of past protests:

1) I have not grown up. I commented to Pants Wilder that on my way out the protesters had better be gone or I was going to have to tell them to go fuck themselves. Happily, they left pretty shortly after they were thoroughly and wonderfully upstaged by the counter-protest. It did remind me of those feelings that used to bubble up when I would volunteer to work as a “peacekeeper” during NC Pride and some tiny, shadow self deep down in my gut would cross its fingers and hope for the chance to beat up a redneck. Not that I would actually do it, I mean, jeez, I’m not an idiot or a bully, but that desire is still there to see the shoe on the other foot for once. (Also, I’m pretty sure my boyfriend would rightly dump me.)

2) My, how times have changed. There were three cops there when the protesters were there and they made me feel… protected. That was gratifying.

3) There were kids – well, 19- or 20-year-olds, college-aged – at this festival who have probably never been to a gay event that was picketed by religious fundamentalists. That hadn’t really occurred to me until I saw a half-dozen Abercrombied young men standing in an arc doing The Masculine Pose – weight on left hip, one foot forward, hands in pockets, sunglasses down – and gaping at the protesters. They have probably never had a bunch of people holding big signs expressing a strong desire to obsess at them about their afterlives and trying to convince them not to do something. They have never seen an organized protest against their own existence. As weird as it is, I am really, really glad those kids had that experience because it doesn’t happen much anymore but it’s a strong reminder of why things like the film festival need to happen in the first place.

4) Somewhat surprisingly, protesters – even young, prematurely soured ones with constipated expressions – will pose for thin-lipped photos with bald old queens and Subaru lesbians. Gods love ‘em, I watched a couple of suburbanite dykes make bunny ears behind one’s head, arms around shoulders, and it brought a tear to my eye.

It was a funny experience that way. Of the five protesters, only one was loud and he was quickly shut down by a double-drag queen. One was having a conversation with someone attending the festival but it was just that: a conversation, a quiet, apparently respectful exchange of views. Two were young, visibly uncomfortable being there and posing for photos with one arm around a queen and the other holding their apparently unironic condemnatory pickets. That one loud guy was having to do, to be frank, a piece of work to keep the hate going.

In the end, I think I’m really glad they were there. We all had a lot of fun, some of it at their expense and some not, and some of us had valuable experiences of what it used to be like pretty much anytime the queer community tried to make a space for itself for a day. So, uh, yeah, protesters. Thanks for coming out. Zing!

It’s about damn time, isn’t it?

I worked the last day of early voting on Saturday. Over 800 people voted at my location, many of them first-time voters. By the end of the day the line ran out the door, up a couple of ramps, across the parking lot, down a driveway to the street and up the block. The last person in line at 1pm voted at 2:45. These folks had to stand in line for a long, long time all day.

The thing that amazed me and made me love Durham even more: everyone was nice. Every single person who talked to me was nice, all day.