I am, apparently, a glutton for punishment and thus I have started hitting the websites for various local animal rescues. It still hurts a little to look at the pictures of cats and hear their stories and wonder what Bruce might have been like ten years from now, or to think of how that little summary of him on the Orange County APS website was so accurate but so failed to capture his full personality. Still, it’s been a month, and in another month or six weeks we may really be looking, and so I figure it’s time to put at least a toe back in the water if for no other reason than to begin to build a thicker skin.

The thing is, every cat has apparently cured cancer. Their biographies are like the back-of-the-napkin draft for any Lifetime special. Allow me to present you with an only slightly satirical sample:

Madam Sniffles was found in a cat carrier left in the parking lot of an abandoned whorehouse. An explanatory note attached to the handle indicated her owner was dying of cancer in a state mental facility and would no longer be able to care for her. Though shy at first, much love and attention have allowed her to blossom into a perfect little princess. She is eager to sit in your lap and “make biscuits.” In the company of other cats, she likes to run and play. In her spare time, she has developed a malaria vaccine, the patent to which she has donated to the United Nations for use in Africa. Despite being only three months old and slightly underweight, in 1999 she saved President Clinton from a little-known attempt on his life by space-ninjas. She has a Ph.D. in 19th century British Literature, and she was the blue-ribbon winner in the NC State Fair’s crochet competition for eight years in a row. Despite being abused by Marxist rebels and blinded in both eyes during the daring rescue of a small child being held captive by an unregistered sex offender, she has learned to love again in her foster home.

She would prefer a family without dogs or small children.

Won’t you give her a forever home?

I mean, Jesus H. in a bad toupee, these animal rescue people are really good at making you want to adopt an animal.

So, here is my question: what Triangle-area animal rescues should I be looking at to further emotionally flog myself? Any rescues with which you have personal experience, or about which you’ve heard good things (or bad things – warnings are also very welcome) or where you just really like to go to look at pictures of kittens would be welcome additions to the comments section.